Last week I had to write a description for my upcoming offering. Not just “a” description, but an “enthusiastic” one, a description that would “create a powerful EMOTIONAL response”. Actually, it was supposed to be "orgasm-inducing". I swear, that was in the task description.
Naturally, I went weak in the knees.
If you knew me personally, you’d remember that writing about myself (enthusiastically!) is literally making me cringe. When I first tried to talk about my programs in a group setting - a very safe and supportive one - the person next to me touched my hand, and soothingly whispered “Marina, please don't have a panic attack!”
Having to write an “enthusiastic” description for my yet-to-be-created product, made me go BLANK.
Let me list what I did instead:
- I Skyped with three people for unrelated matters.
- I loaded up the dishwasher.
- I made Halloween costumes for my entire family. I kid you not, we all went as Harry Potter characters.
- I almost called my dad, but he was in a meeting in a different time zone.
We all have have experienced this “Emotional Block”, this resistance, when we face a task far outside our comfort zone. Writers hit a famous Writer’s Block. “I-don’t-do-systems” people avoid their budgets like a plague. Kids pretend to have a belly-ache, in front of a boring homework.
How do we deal with Emotional Resistance, move it out of the way, and get THAT THING, that excruciatingly painful task, the one that feels like slowly pushing through a barbed-wire fence,
how do we get it DONE?
Here is what I did in the end:
Desperate, I wrote the following in the group that hosted the assignment:
“I just want to say, I am agonizing over this "Day 4 Challenge". Anyone else feels deeply uncomfortable talking enthusiastically and publicly about oneself, or is it just me? I know it's vital, I know it's non-negotiable, and I JUST. CAN’T. DO. IT. Everything I say sounds self-serving and inappropriate. I used the template and it came out grossly cliché. Please help!”
I never hit “Post”, I just wrote it to sit out there, and then...
Let me tell you what happened next:
I offloaded the destructive feeling of being stuck, unworthy, “never going to make it”, and...
Miraculously, I sat down, took the template in question, filled it out, tweaked it, and - lo and behold! - it was DONE. It was there. I posted to the group with a pretty picture, and that was it.
When you feel deeply, uncomfortably stuck, try this:
Put your emotions into WORDS, in a pretend public setting. Heck, you can even do it publicly, if you possess that type of courage.
Do you feel helpless? lost? resentful? panic-y?
Write it down, say it out loud, give a voice to your frustrations.
Here is why it works:
You give a SHAPE to your emotions. Shape means finite boundaries. A defined emotion is much easier to handle, a.k.a. to make it get the hell out of your way.
After you've done this, you have enough emotional headspace to do what you need, be it a budget review, a product description, a sales call, or anything else.
Let me know in the comment section, what the task you absolutely HAVE to do, that makes you so uncomfortable to the point of squirming. And if you feel inclined, feel free to give words your feelings, right here. And THEN, let us know what. happens. NEXT.